Monday, April 30, 2012

Day 155: Interesting...

Well today has been interesting. I went to work and a little free I had been there I got a call from my DM letting me know that two of the top people in our company submitted their resignations today. I don't know what that means as of yet, but of course my company has been struggling financially to meet its goals and expectations because nearly every large corporation in the nation has been struggling and many folding Orr the past few years. And I'll be the first to admit that it freaks me out! I don't know what I would do if this wasn't my job. My whole world would change. I've threatened to find something else before, but I always end up back at the basics. I have a really nice schedule flexibly that I would lose, I get 21 paid days off a year that I have earned from working here for so long, and I love what I do 85% of the time.

After work I went to the gym for a little bit. I haven't been there in a whole because I've been running around like a chicken with my head cut off and of course my knee has been a big concern for nearly two weeks now. It's really weird...some days (like today) I have very little knee pain, and then on others it's nearly unbearable. All I know is that I can't lose weight of I don't exercise. I am not good enough with my diet to lose on diet alone, not to mention the fact that I don't even know if that's possible for me since it's so hard to get the weight off in the first place! Lol.

After my short stop at the gym I headed to small group bible study. We had baked potatoes for dinner, so I kept pretty low on my calories today so that I wouldn't blow them out of the water tonight. And all in all I think I did really well with that!

I think I mentioned before that we started a new bible study called 40 Days in The Word. If I didn't then I did now! Haha. And I have to say...I'm really enjoying it!! It's a study that's helps you learn to read AND study the bible and the man who put it together very obviously knows his stuff! So I look forward to learning a lot over the next few weeks!! The people that are a part of my small group bible study are all pretty stinking amazing. I love the time I get to spend with them and find myself a little sad when it's over and I know I have to wait another WEEK to see them again. :( But this week we are making dinner for some men who have been working on the construction of our church and I'm excited for it! We will do that Saturday night, so I have to do a little bit of juggling my work schedule to be able to be there.

Now I'm home and it's late and I need to get a couple of things done really quickly and get off to dream land!

Good night friends!
<3 Honor

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Day 154: A Special Lady & A Gallbladder Mess!

Today has been a fairly eventful day. I went to church this morning and my pastor had this time during our morning worship when he says if God puts any particular person or need on your heart to go pray with them. I was just excited to have Jamie at church with me for the first time in a while so I had just planned to stay put, because I know he gets a little uncomfortable if I leave him alone. And right behind us the preachers wife comes. She Embraced us both in a loose hug and said she felt that God wanted her to come pray with us because she knew that we both yearned to have a child. Man, I'm telling you right now, that's all it took for the flood gates to open and me to start bawling like a little baby! No one has ever prayed for us like that for that specific reason. And I didn't even ask. She just knew! And the words of her prayer were just beautiful and they touched my heart. She is an amazing wife to our pastor and an amazing woman of God.

After church, Jamie and I went to eat lunch and my sister was texting me and telling me how her gall bladder was bothering her more than usual and this is the third day in a row. And she was in some pretty intense pain! I called a girl in from work and she covered my shift for me today so that I could go talk her into going to the hospital. She starts a new job tomorrow so she really needed to confirm that it was her fall bladdernd, find out how bad it was, and hopefully get some pain medicine. The problem is that when she has gone to the ER before, they check her in (she doesn't have insurance) and they don't even run any tests or ANYTHING! What of she was dying or something?!? The last time she went to the ER the doctor on duty told her she needed to schedule an ultrasound with a doctor the next day...uh hello? No insurance! They won't schedule testing without full payment! So she needed to be tested IN the ER..,I was beginning to think that just wasn't possible...but today, we went to a different hospital. And they didn't even ASK about insurance until AFTER she was treated. I thought that was awesome! I felt like she got treated as any other patient would be. And she was treated VERY well! The staff was AMAZING and they had her an X-ray and an ultrasound within 30 minutes of her getting called back! Plus they pumped her full of fluids and gave her some pain meds interveiniously (sp?) and gave her a prescription for some pain meds. Overall, I thought it was a very good visit and she also got a referral for a surgeon. So hopefully, as soon as her new insurance kicks in from her new job, she'll be able to finally get this taken care of!!

I'm now home and it's late and I'm super tired and have a busy day to go tomorrow. Good night friends!
<3 Honor

Day 152 & 153: Still mending

Well, I'm starting to feel a little better. I have done awful as far as calories go the past week or so. The only thing I've been able to drink is Sprite. And I can't stand to drink Diet Sprite.

Not I mention that my eating choices have been garbage most of the week. I have got to get better and get back on the wagon! My knee is still bothering me so my exercise has been seriously lacking. It has just been bad all around!

The crazy thing is that I haven't been eating a lot, yet the scale says otherwise! This journey is definitely not easy, but it is WORTH it! The amount of things I will gain from a healthier body and lifestyle far out way the sacrifices involved in getting there...but I will NEVER say this journey was easy THAT'S for sure!

I don't even think I've logged in to in like THREE days! But I logged in today and did pretty good! I had orange sherbet after dinner and I swear I could eat a whole tub of that stuff! 90 calories per half cup sure does add up! Haha

Good night!
<3 Honor

Friday, April 27, 2012

Day 149-151: Wow! this is what sickness does!

Well I have been miserable the past three days and I guess it shows in my blog writing! I've never missed two days in a row! Wow!

Nothing seriously eventful has happened. My food choices have been crap because I crave sweet and salty when I'm sick because that's all I can taste! And marshmallows seem to have been my cure the past few days! I didn't weigh in on Tuesday because I overslept and was running late for work so I just headed out. Today I have been asleep all day! I've been up for a couple of hours an am ready to go back to sleep. I went to the doctor and I just have a sinus infection, but I haven't been sick like this in a really long time. So it's really getting me down!

I really feel pretty awful still so I'm going to go back to bed. I have a short work day tomorrow and then Relay!

Good night!
<3 Honor

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Day 148: Mundane

Today was one of those days for the most part. Lol. I mean nothing crazy eventful happened. I worked all day. Jamie took me to lunch at the Chinese place and we had a nice lunch together.

Work wasn't busy so it just dragged on and on. I did a lot of catching up and calling people to have them come get their pictures. That makes me relatively insane because they have 6,000 excuses as to why they haven't been in or why they can't be in by the deadline. My company expects me to be able to force people to come pay for their pictures! So it's a little stressful.

After work I went straight to bible study. We are starting this new study called 40 days in the word. I thing it's going to be really great! I just have to commit myself, and that's the hard part!

After bible study I stayed and talked to Ms. Edie to late (I always do) she's just easy to talk to! Lol. I practically have I kick myself out or I'll stand there talking to her all night!

By the time I got home my knee was hurting me really bad again. This is not good. I thought it was getting better! I'm going to the gym tomorrow night and praying I'm able to do some cardio because I know the scale isn't going to be good to me in the morning. It has need a really bad week!

Good night!
<3 Honor

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Day 147: Self Discipline

Last night by the time I laid my head on my bed I barely had the energy to move myself into a comfortable position. I just felt terrible! I had a fever and crazy sore throat and just ached all over! So I took some nighttime meds and went to sleepy wonderland. Lol. I slept for over 12 hours! And don't even get up at all in the night! But the result was me feeling a little better today.

My eating choices have been pretty crappy the last few days and today was no exception. I've got to get it reeled in and keep it there! I don't want to spend the next year trying to get 20 pounds off! I want to make a SPLASH! I only have 128 more pounds to go to reach my goal weight so I'm really almost halfway there in 5 months! But I'm having a hard time keeping myself as dedicated as I was. It's a daily struggle and I've GOT to get my focus back!

I know that I've still been seeing the numbers drop, but indefinitely know that I could be doing a LOT better. And the faster I get the weight off, the better I will feel! 72 pounds are gone forever!! I can do this! I'm not the same person I was 72 pounds ago. I'm a stronger more disciplined version of me! Self-discipline has always been very hard for me, and I still have a LOT of work to do in that category. But I have to keep making progress!!

Good night!
<3 Honor

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Day 146: Stronger than Yesterday

Ok so yea I love the song that is the same as my title :-) but that really is how I'm feeling. I have these knee bands that I got to wear to Zumba and when I do high intensity cardio and I forget to wear them half of the time...but I was in spinning class a few weeks ago and there was a girl in there that had a band like mine on and she was talking about how she has been having knee problems and her doctor told her to wear the band all the time when she was up during the day. So this morning I saw mine sitting on the dryer and thought, "Hey, it couldn't hurt!" and I have to knee feels significantly better today! And I'm GLAD! Because I was really scared that it might be something serious that would require medical attention and my insurance STINKS! So that's no good!

On the down side, I feel like doodoo today. It started out with the swollen and tender throat and has moved on to achy body and my eyes burn, which usually means I'm running a fever. Yuck! It's most likely just sinusitis, but I haven't been sick in a really long time (actually I have only had the little stomach thing that I thought was food poisoning a few weeks ago and that's IT since I started taking better care of myself!)

So aside from feeling like poo I had a nice busy day that made my TEN hours seem to go by a little faster. For lunch I went out to my car and set an alarm and just took a nap. I thought maybe that would rejuvenate me and help me get through the day, but on second thought, I think I feel worse since I took the nap! Lol

After work I got me something to eat and took care of my animals and I'm ready to go to bed early. Hopefully the combination of a good nights sleep with some Vick's Cold & Flu will help me feel better tomorrow!

<3 Honor

Friday, April 20, 2012

Day 145: Serious Injury?

Ok, I think I have my first exercise induced injury. My knee was hurting more than usual yesterday, but today it's pretty bad. I don't think I tore any ligaments or anything like that. But I definitely think I must have strained them. :( I'm ok when I'm walking, very mild pain. It's when I have to bend my knee or twist it in any way. So I guess that means I'm going to have to take the cardio on the easy side. Definitely no Zumba until its not hurting like this. I'm freaked out! I don't know what I'm going to do for cardio! I'll definitely have to look some stuff up and see what I can find out...

So other than my knee pain, my day was pretty great. I got to take pictures of Ms. Olivia's kiddos and they are super cute, so we got some great stuff! I only worked four hours today and I got to work with Ariel because she is going to be the manager in Cape and yesterday was her first day back so she needed to get her feet wet from being gone for 90 days :) and thank Go she was there! My phone rang non-stop and we had people picking up and it was just craziness for a bit. By the time we got caught up it was time to go!

I got off at 2 and went to eat with my friend Bethany and Ariel with her boyfriend. Good times :-) And afterward I ran home to change get ready for my nephews birthday. I made him a power rangers cake, so I had to get that loaded up too.

I got out to the park Early (imagine that!) and it was FREEZING! I had thought to grab a jacket, but WOW. I had to have my sis get me another one and I was still cold! Lol Josif loved his cake so my part was a success!

After the party I came home and watched tv for a bit and now I'm ready for bed. My knee is REALLY bothering me and I hope it is at least a little enter tomorrow, because I work all day by myself. :( oh boy!

Good night!
<3 Honor

Day 144: Ouchie Mamasita!

Wowee my body hurts! I feel like I've run a Marathon or something! I'm keeping this one short because I've got to get to bed soon since I'm going back to work tomorrow. I'm pretty excited about my first appointment in the morning :-) My good friend Olivia (who has been on this journey with me) is bringing her babies to come see me. :-) yay!!

Today was bad as far as food goes. I've been doing really well so since it was my last day of vacation, I decided to be a little more relaxed on what I ate. No regrets!

I got a LOT done today! Including finishing up a Power Rangers cake for my favorite little nephew :-) his birthday is tomorrow evening and now his cake is all ready to go!

Good night friends!
<3 Honor

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Day 143: Overdone!

Well I've been a busy Chica today! I only have one more day of my vacation left so today I went into it knowing I had a lot to get done. And I did get quite a bit done! The day went by way to fast! When Jamie got home from work this mining I loaded up all kinds if different things I've collected from cleaning. Things that go to my sis, my momma, my cousin, a co-worker, the post office, and the list goes on! So I loaded everything up and went to do my errands.

In the middle of my running I ran into my sis and I ended up calling Jamie and us all meeting to eat lunch. We went to Mexican and I only ate half of my plate! I was actually really excited about it because I was full!

Afterward it was a shorter than anticipated return home because the power went out! So I packed up some senior pictures, put on my workout clothes and off I went...back to town. I dropped the pictures off to some happy clients and then off to the gym. I did some strength training and I believe I may have overdone it a bit, because I am hurting! Mostly my knee. I get really annoyed with my knee. :( I just want it and my plantar faciitus to go away. I haven't had any symptoms at all in my right foot for months, but my left one is still really bothering me. But it WILL get better. It will!

Good night friends! I have a long day to go tomorrow. :-)
<3 Honor

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Day 142: Weigh Day

Oh, oh...I was so excited to see what the scale had for me today. I wanted so badly to hit the 270's and....I DID! 277.8 woot, woot! That means this was a pretty good week, even though it could have been much BETTER! I always wonder how big the numbers could be if I did exactly perfect all week. I never do though. I'm a cheater, but the little cheating is how I stay on target! Lol! I'm fully aware that that doesn't make a luck of sense, but I'm ok with it ;-)

Today was a good day. I always seem to have good days when it's a good weigh day. It just sets the tone for the rest of the day. And today I felt thinner! I'm fully aware that I have a LONG way to go, but it's nice to feel GOOD!

I got quite a bit done around the house today. I can feel the heat coming on that my vacation is almost over (only 2 days left!) and I'm sad about it! I wish I could have a whole nother week lol. But that's not reality. I've got to go back to work until late June when I get another 9 days off for a big wedding that I'm shooting and then Jamie and I plan to go to the lake for a few days after that. I'm ready! Are we there yet?! I'm not feeling very patient right now! Haha

I talked to my momma for a bit today and found out that she's down to 215! I'm so proud of her! And she's very excited to be so close to 1durland :-) she hasn't weighed under 200 in more than 20 years! Wow! So keep her in your prayers! She's working hard and I'm super excited for her.

I have a lot planned for tomorrow so I wonder of I'll get HALF of it done! Haha I guess we'll see! Have a good night!
<3 Honor

Day 141: Spaghetti Brains

Today was one of those fairly uneventful days. Lol. I didn't get hardly anything accomplished because I slept to late and then puddled around the house. I did, however, make a gigantic batch of spaghetti for small group bible study, our group had to move to Mondays because we were conflicting with the leaders children's ball practice schedule. Wow that was a mouth full! Lol.

So anyways, since I've been on vacation, I volunteered to cook both times because I normally work and can't make anything. Making a large quantity of food like that is no easy task! But I did sneak in some healthy on everyone. :-) I used a spaghetti sauce that has a serving of vegetables in a cup of the sauce. Very cool! And it did NOT taste like it. Plus I used lean ground beef in the sauce. :-) yep, I'm sneaky like that!

I love going to bible study, but even more when I've missed church that week. It makes me feel connected. Our lesson right now is about being in the word and spending more time connecting with God on an individual level. I've really got to step up and get on this bus. Because one of my very large spiritual downfalls is not spending enough time reading the bible and studying it.

Have a good night! Weigh day tomorrow! I pray that I'll be in the 270's even if only by a pound :)
<3 Honor

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Day 139 & 140: Wow...I Did It Again!

Ok, apparently I am incapable of posting a blog everyday these days! I don't know what has gotten in to me! This blog is as much for me as it is for you! So I have seriously got to step it up!

The past two days have been ok. Today was much more productive than yesterday. I delivered the Winnie The Pooh cake yesterday to a very happy client, and then ended up watching Make It or Break It half of the day! Pitiful! When Jamie got home he helped me put in our living room light (which has been sitting in a box for a few weeks!) and I was really impressed with how much I liked it! Lol, I know that sounds weird, but we've been using lamps for a little while and I love lamp lighting...but I didn't realize how much I missed the big overhead light! And the cool thing is that ever since we moved in we had this weird looking light fixture that was connected to a dimmer, but for some reason the dimmer didn't work. Well...with the new light IT WORKS! And I love it! Yea, I know it's just a silly dimmer...but I don't complain about where I find my happiness! LOL!!

So anyways, the other day I went to the doctor (you know...the lady doctor) and I haven't to see this particular doctor in 6 years, (I actually hadn't planned on seeing him again, because I wasn't a fan of his professionalism, but I had to see someone and didn't want to go to Cape. So anyways!!....LOL....when I checked in with the receptionist, I asked her to check my file and see when it was exactly that I was there before. She told me 2006, and then I asked her what my weight was then and she said 283...and on my visit (in the middle of the day), I weighed at 282. So that may not seem like any big deal to anyone else...BUT to me that means I am the lightest I've been in 6 years!! That's awesomeness! Of course, that also means I gained 69 pounds and then lost 70...but I gained the 69 pounds over 5 and a half years and lost it in just under 6 months! Now, if only I could get my commitment level back where it needs to be so I can start seeing some good numbers again!

Like I said earlier, today has been a productive day. I was able to get rid of a bunch of junk and did some serious organizing! I still have QUITE a ways to go, but I'm definitely happy with my progress today. I also did pretty well with my food today too, so that puts me in a really good mood!

I've been really struggling this week with food. It seems like I always am and I hate that! I wish I could just stay focused and not give in, but my resistance SUCKS! And this week has been one of the worst. I keep craving stuff that is no good, and no amount of "trickery" is going to stop it. I either give in, or ignore it. And I'm not good at the ignoring part. For me...self discipline in the gym is way easier than self-discipline in my diet. I don't know why! I haven't been to the gym as much as I would have liked to this week either, but if I'm going to get this place back in order by Thursday, then I have to sacrifice my gym time a little.

I missed church this morning and I was really bummed out about it. I could NOT get my body to go to sleep last night. I ended up being awake at 5am! So I slept straight through church. That really stinks! Especially since I have to work next Sunday morning so that I will be able to go to my handsome little nephew's birthday party next Sunday night. I'm making him a Power Rangers cake and he's totally going to LOVE it. :) I can't wait to put it together for him!

I guess I better get off of here and wrap up some things for the night and try to get to bed before to awful late!

<3 Honor

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Day 138: Procrastination!

Wow, today was fairly unproductive! Ok, not THAT bad, but I could have DEFINETELY gotten a lot more accomplished, but seemed to have a crazy bad lazy day!

I had a cake to made and it did get finished, but I had to stay up super late because I got started so late on it.
I spent most of the day sitting on my duff because I had a headache and felt just kindof all over Bleh! That's not really an excuse and because of it, I pretty much wasted a whole day. The good thing is that the cake turned out cute and it's DONE!

I did get to see my good friend Ariel for a while today though. :-) She was really nice to bring me one of those digital converter boxes because we had satellite when all of that went down and I honestly never thought there would be a time when I didn't have satellite. But I got so tired of paying WAY to much for it, and since we had Netflix I just shut off the satellite. So now after having it off for a while I really don't miss it much, except to see a few favorite shows, many of which are online or will be put on Netflix after the season is over. But I was realizing that I could see a lot of stuff on the regular local channels, so I started talking about one of those boxes and she offered to let us borrow it. :-) Now I just have to get a good antenna, because at this point the choices are pretty limited. We got Fox or! But that's ok too, because my momma has a antenna that they aren't using that she said I could have! So it all just kindof worked itself out pretty well! I love it when stuff like that happens :-)

Jamie had military duty today. This is his last drills with his unit. He turns his equipment in this weekend. He was just going to get out and that be that...but now he's seriously considering the reserves if they offer him a sign-on bonus. That scares the 'you know what' out of me because a nice big sign-on bonus means Afghanistan next year. I would be so proud of him to serve our country over seas, but at the same time I would live in fear of his return. Afraid the whole time that he wouldn't return, and then when he did, terrified that he would be so different that we wouldn't be able to pick back up our lives. It goes both ways. And every single man tells his wife that he won't let it change him, or it will be ok, or whatever to pacify her before he leaves. But some come back the same and some don't. Geez!! It terrifies me!

So anyways, yea...that was my day in a I'm exhausted and headed to bed, so I can get up and deliver this cake tomorrow! :-)

<3 Honor

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Day 136 & 137: Space Out I guess I totally spaced out yesterday and completely forgot to write a blog. I think I'm LOSING it! Lol

It's been a pretty good couple of days. I haven't gotten as much done as I would have liked, but it seems like I always expect more of myself than I can actually pull off. :-)

I grilled lunch yesterday and it was super good! And then I had Applebee's for dinner...not so good! GOSH!

And then today I had a really yummy salad for lunch. I had bought some little mini turkey pepperonis and thy were super good! Dinner wasn't such a hot choice though. I had bible study and I made homemade chili. Oh my! It was really good...but definitely not a smart choice.

I've been pretty busy trying to organize and clean things. So that's pretty much it for now. Lol.

<3 Honor

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Day 135: Weigh-Day

Ok, this is my first official weigh day since the end of the competition. And I know I should have been doing better and staying 'on it' more, but I think I needed that short time of more relaxed rules for myself, because I've come a long way, and I definitely don't want to do anything to go dee my progress, and I have so much MORE to do.

I honestly stepped on that scale praying to see the 282 again. Because I fluctuated up after the competition with water retention and poor choices. So I was kindof just hoping for a clean slate! And lo and behold...the scale gave me 280...I was shocked...I'm about to be in the 270's. Oooooh MY GOODNESS!!!!! I don't even know what to think about that. Is been SOOOO long! And I'm SUPER excited about it! :-)

Today at work was a funny day...when I worked yesterday I noticed that I didn't have not a single appointment scheduled for pics today. Our company is soooooo focused on sitting that I was FREAKED out! So I posted on facebook and by the time I got to work I had a full schedule! The one hour I though I wouldn't have anybody had booked by someone else online! So no boring day for me today!! I ran around like a chicken with my head cut off!!

After work I headed straight to the gym and did some weight training. I'm trying really hard to make myself do more weight training because that's really important during weight loss and something I find terribly easy to leave out of my workouts! I don't do free weights yet. Mostly because I'm afraid of looking like an idiot out there. So I'll save that for when I've lost more weight. I do the machines. Cindy, my trainer for the competition, made me out a paper in the beginning showing all of the machines and what I did on them each time we did strength training together. I pulled up that list tonight to see where I was and make sure I was building up and was QUITE shocked and how much more I can do from the beginning! I'm pushing myself more now because I know that the more muscle I have, the more calories my body will burn. And I need all the help I can get!! I also found out that it is insanely difficult for a woman to 'bulk up' without taking enhancers or steroids. And that's all I have really been worried about so I mean business now! Lol

Have a good night!
<3 Honor

Day 133 & 134: Not becoming a habit!

I PROMISE this is not about to be becoming a habit! LOL. I have a really good reason for not blogging yesterday. So here goes... Easter Sunday...the studio's schedule wasn't to bad for the first half of the day, so I was able to go to church with my s and my parents in Bloomfield. After church Daddy actually asked if we wanted to go get something to eat...we were pretty stoked about that because he rarely has the energy, so we jumped on that opportunity! We ended up at a buffet styled steak house and I had very small portions and didnt get wild and crazy, but I could have definitely made healthier decisions. After lunch I went straight to work and was feeling a rumble in my tummy, but I thought I had eaten to much. By the time I said goodbye to my last customer I felt like I was definitely going to be sick! So I put out a closed sign and headed to the restroom. I stayed there forever! I really thought as soon as I got up I would be in trouble. I was dizzy and feeling my stomach lurch. I stayed there for 45 minutes with nothing happening and decided to try to go close the studio real quick so could get home and lay down...but I didn't make it out of the bathroom :-( it was bad. B.A.D.

I finally made it back to the studio, but grabbed a trash bag just in case, because I didn't get that instant feeling of 'better' I still felt TERRIBLE. And I didn't make it through closing before I was sick again. At that point I was weak and feeling pretty miserable, so I mustered up every ounce of energy I had and finished up so I could leave.

When I walked in my front door at 8pm I laid down on the couch and didn't get up a single time until 9:15 this morning!! I felt better this morning, but still definitely not on my 'A' game. I only had a 4 hour shift at work, and by the time I made it through that, I was feeling pretty yucky again.

I had purchased a little $40 grill at Wal-Mart and was really wanting to put it together today and grill my dinner since my grill is all messed up and it doesn't really cook right because of it. It's funny...I spent over $200 for the grill we had, it's all fancy and pretty and has a nice big grilling surface and a little door you can open to add or move charcoal. Yea real nice...until the crappy grill cover came off in the winter and it got all rusted out!! We had it for maybe two or three summers and now it's garbage. And the sad thing is that the base of it is fine! But the part that holds the drawer in at the bottom is a thin price of metal and that rusted, so it's no good now because the whole under side is a gaping hole' what a waste of money! So I got this $40 grill thinking, "Hey if I have to get a new one every year I can afford that!" but you know what? I put that puppy together this afternoon and it's pretty sturdy! I spent less than $10 for a tarp and a bungee cord to lay over it and keep it covered and I'll bet you that $50 lasts me a heck of a lot longer than the other grill! And the kicker is, after I put it together I noticed that the grilling surface is almost as big as the old one was!!

So anywho, I got that done, and that took my energy that I it's rest and relaxing for this sick girl for the rest of the grilling on my new grill tonight, because I feel like doodoo and had to eat something light. Boo. Lol.

Tomorrow is my last day of work before my "Spring Cleaning" vacation and I'm stoked! I'm going to be burning a LOT of garbage and donating anything else we don't need! My hubby is a pretty bad hoarder (he hides it so I don't find it til later, that sneaky man!) so we had lots of JUNK!

Fun times...
<3 Honor

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Day 132: Busy, Busy

Today is the day before Easter...and in the world of commercial photography....that means all the procrastinators came to see me. Ok, it wasn't as bad as it could have been for sure! But we did 10 sessions! So it was a good (and busy) day. Most of of customers were really great, which makes for a good day. But there were a few crazy ones that made it interesting.

Since it was so busy at work I had Subway for lunch. That's something I've been cutting back on because Subway is a carb overload. I may be able to get a low calorie lunch...but sometimes you need to look beyond the calories!

After work I was super tired! I came home and was in that mood that nothing healthy sounded good and ended up eating Pizza Rolls for dinner! Really Honor?! I don't know why I can't just stop myself from making those ignorant decisions, because I know it's a bad idea...but I still do it!

Alright I'm tired and ready to hit they hay (and watch some Vampire Diaries in the process;)

<3 Honor

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Day 130 & 131: Oopsy

I totally didn't realize that I skipped a day! I've been crazy busy with work and other things and I guess I just forgot! That makes me

The last couple of days have been a little better. Thursday's Zumba class was hardcore. I don't know If it was just me or what but I was really pushing it more than usual!

Today I didn't get any exercise in since I worked all day, so that sucks. I always feel like I've done something wrong when I don't workout. I know it's ok to take days off from working out. But right now I'm having a really hard time with my food choices, so making sure I'm exercising makes me feel like I'm still moving in the right direction. I don't understand why it is that I can make really good food choices for the first 75% of the day, and then BAM I RUIN EVERYTHING right at the end of the day. It really makes me crazy!!

Today I did really REALLY good, and then I went to Buffalo Wild Wings with my sister and a co-worker and that was it...I was done for.

I have to do better. And I have to get into a routine of consistency because my metabolism is so shot. Tomorrow is another day, and it's going to be crazy busy at work. So I'm going to have a GREAT day!

Good night!
<3 Honor

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Day 129: I See the Light!

Oh yay! I'm so excited, lol. I got on te scale this morning and it finally MOVED. I had a feeling that it might since I've been carrying around about 5 pounds of water weight and I was peeing like a pregnant lady last night! Haha!! So now I'm still up one pound from my final weight for the Competition, but I'm going in the right direction again and I'll be dipping in to those 270's before ya know it!!

I am SOOOO thankful to have seen the scale move for me. My brain was really starting to play tricks on me and I was getting in a bit of a rut!! NO RUTS! I can't WAIT to get under 250! I know I still have a while to go before I get there, but I'm excited about it! That's my 100 pound mark :-)

I made plans with my cousin to come over for grilled Kabobs for lunch today and they were really yummy. I bought a box of angel food cake mix a few weeks ago with the plans to make it into cupcakes. A cupcake equals out to only 40 calories! So I enjoyed one with strawberries and whipped cream today after lunch and it was REALLY good. :-)

I did a little bit of light cleaning around the house and then it was time for Zumba! I did two hours tonight and was SUPER proud of myself for sticking it out because it was soooooo hot in that room!! 80 degrees with around 40 ladies...yea, we were some steamin' hot mamasitas!!! I seriously didn't plan on staying the full two hours, but my sis came the second hour and I just ended up staying. Lol. I was really glad that I did too!!

Good night :-)
<3 Honor

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Day 128: Stuck!

So I guess I have officially plateaued. :-( I have some water weight on me, so I'm actually up by five pounds from last Friday! And I've been trying REALLY hard to get that back off, but my body is being VERY stubborn. So I think it's time for drastic measures. Something I said I would do if I had to, but I sure wasn't excited about it.....I think....I'm going to have to....cut down on my Carbs!! Ohmageez!!! Lol. I'm super sad about it!! I like my carbs!! I don't plan to make it something that is long term. Just temporarily to get the weight coming off again. Oh I'm sad about it. LOL! Yes, I'm going to whine like a baby... DON'T JUDGE ME!! Hahhahaa

So my plan is to do some shopping tonight after I get done at the Y, and I'm going to do a egg white scramble for breakfast in place of my oatmeal, and I'll exchange my turkey and cheese sandwich that I usually have for lunch for turkey and cheese roll-ups. I'm not going to worry about the carbs that come in fruits and veggies. Just te bread/pasta/grain carbs for now. We'll see how it goes.

I will have to do as much prep work as possible for the scrambles because I'm always in a rush in the mornings. So I'm going to have to pre-cut up some turkey and veggies.

Oh joy...this will be so much fun (*note sarcasm here*) Lol!

Have a good one:-)
<3 Honor

Day 127: Better

I'm sure it has been pretty easy to tell that I have been struggling lately. I'm trying REALLY hard to shift my mental focus and stay on track. I have worked out quite a lot over the last week, but I have made some bad food choices. 3,500 calories equal a pound yet way less than that means a pound or even more for me. I'm also fighting with water weight at the moment too, so it's very discouraging.

I made very good eating choices today. I did go out to dinner with one of my girls from work and had quite a few calories there, but I hadn't had very many at all up to that point. I know that's not the way I need to do it, and I'm working on it. I've got to get out of the restaurants. I enjoy eating out waaaaaaay to much and I get carried away. But today was better...

I went to the gym and did a spinning class and an hour of Zumba, and then I did some strength training. I really pushed it on the strength training so I'm planning to be sore tomorrow! Lol.

I've been talking to this girl, Heather, who has been going to my church. She's a junior in high school and is struggling with her weight. I've been giving her advice and tips and trying to help her out. Last night she came to the gym with me and went to Zumba and did some strength training. She's a strong girl! She said that her mom has Huntington's so she wants to get her weight off to prolong the symptoms from coming if she has it too. I don't know anything at all about Huntington's, but it seemed like a huge deal to her and I want to help her.

I can't lose the weight FOR someone, but I sure can give advice and inspiration along the way! And I think stuff like that is what will keep me on track!

Gotta catch some zzz's :-)
<3 Honor

Monday, April 2, 2012

Day 126: NEVER give up!

The one thing you always have to remember through any struggle you might face while trying to change your life is that it is NEVER to late. You are NEVER a lost cause. And at NO point have you reached the point of no return!! You CAN change. You CAN keep going.

People who say this isn't that hard or all it takes is dedication are either liars or it's easier for them than it is for me! Because this is VERY hard and it takes dedication, determination, faith, hope & a mind-set that even when you fall off the wagon for a day, a few days, a few weeks, months or EVEN years---you can still refocus, reevaluate, & get back on track.

If you are overweight, then most likely it's because you have a mental issue that causes you to turn to food in times of stress, for comfort, or any other number of reasons. It's a Brain thing! And unless you Really look at yourself and work to shift your mental focus...all of the hard work will be wasted.

I don't know why, but I just had to share all of that. Lol. I'm working on practicing what I preach and I will be the first to admit that it is a daily struggle for me. But I keep reminding myself of how much I'm going to gain from all of this hard work! Sometimes it's almost impossible to push through the cravings though. And let me tell ya...when I do give in to the temptation as SOON as I swallow, I regret it.

Having something that isn't healthy is NOT against the rules for me. Because I know that that is just not something that I could stick with. But the problem for me is not just indulging in one thing. After I have indulged that one time, it seems to be easier to indulge again and again and again. And then after a while you get to where you don't have that feeling of regret as soon as you take that bite. I get numb to the feeling. So I can't ever let myself get to that point again.

Okay I'm done for the night, I need to go to bed and get some rest!
<3 Honor

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Day 125: Metabolism frenzy

Today was a hard day! As far as food choices go, it started out great. I had my normal oatmeal for breakfast. And I brought my lunch, which consisted of a sandwich, grapes, and baby carrots. In my opinion that's a pretty nutritious lunch. But while I was at work, everything was nuts! There is so much drama going on right now it just kills me. And I will be overjoyed when my boss returns to her position. Which will be Monday morning and I can't wait!!!

So work was crazy, I started out in Cape. And I think at one point I was doing 15 things that once! So by the time I left Cape Studio I was pretty stressed. I went straight to Sikeston studio and then things got crazier in the district. And then I bought some candy… And then I ate it… And then they came back up… That seems to happen every time I try to eat something I know I shouldn't. And to be quite honest, my food choices or crap for the rest of the day. I get so frustrated about food! I am the only person I know that can eat a bag of skittles which by the way only have like 300 cal in them, and the next morning the scale says she gained 2 pounds. It's something about sugar and white crap I guess, I don't know... all I know is that this has been the worst week ever. And I have definitely got to buckle down and get back on track.

My first thought, was that I was still going to exercise really hard, and eat well, but just be a little bit more relaxed with myself. I mean I've been going at it hard-core for four months!! You would think I can slack off just a little bit and still be able to lose weight. But no, my body has to be a pain in my butt! And as I'm sure you can tell I'm not excited about it. I worked too hard to get where I'm at for my metabolism to screw me over at this point!! I have a long way to go and I'm not about to quit fighting yet.

Good night,
<3 Honor